Just Out Of Reach
by EtrnlPsyche
Summary: Simply put, an emotional triangle. Post BtVS Chosen and PreSupernatural. BuffyDean Winchester Buffy John Winchester
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

Dean Winchester took a long, slow drink of his beer savoring the cold liquid as it slid down his throat, cooling the burn that he so often experienced on his nights hustling pool. Only, this wasn't one of those nights.

Tonight he was brooding. Something he'd been getting better at.

He glared at the couple at the bar, disgust pulling at his gut as the older man ran his hand over the tender flesh of the beautiful young woman beside him.

She tossed her hair over her shoulder without a thought and smiled, her eyes a sparkling green in the dim light of the bar. Her hand raised to the man's cheek, her palm resting against the dusting of hair, three or four days of growth, pulling him down to press her lips to his.

Dean glanced at his watch and rolled his eyes. Three hours. He'd watched the disgusting display for three hours.

There was a dull ache in the pit of his stomach as her flashing eyes met his through the smoky cloud that hung in the center of the room, offering a brilliant smile as she slid off of the barstool and slipped her arm around the older man's waist as he pulled her possessively to his side.

After one last swig, the beer bottle clattered to the table as Dean rose to follow the couple out of the bar. He came to a stop at his car watching as they stopped next to the large black truck that Dean had recently found to be more elusive than bigfoot.

After a few nuzzling kisses and a hug that lasted entirely too long, the man climbed into the driver's seat, the loud engine roaring to life as he slowly drove the lot coming to a stop by Dean's Impala.

"Take care of my girl, son," the gruff voice called out, not waiting for a response as he rumbled out of sight.

Dean nodded slowly and turned to the short blonde, unable to hide his smile as the stared up at him, eyes wide with amusement. "You heard him, Dean. Take care of me," she chuckled.

A short snort caught in his throat as he motioned for her to get into the car, "Why do you do this to yourself?"

She frowned as she slid across the car to settle against the passenger side door. "Do what?"

He couldn't look at her so he busied himself with pulling out of the lot. "He doesn't love you Buffy? He's never loved anyone but my mom. I just don't want you getting hurt."

A sad smile pulled at her mouth. "He may not love me, Dean, but he does deserve to be loved."

"So do I," he muttered, his voice barely audible. "So do I."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Dean groaned and cracked open an eye as the soft scratching at the motel room door drew him from a dreamless sleep. The tension that seized his body at the sound slowly released as he noticed the bed beside his hadn't been slept in.

"What time is it?" he growled when he heard the soft click of the latch, not daring to strain his neck to look at the clock. He knew she would answer.

"Five-thirty," she said quickly, her voice almost inaudible as she prepared for his wrath. If there was one thing that Dean couldn't live without it was his sleep. No doubt today he would be an ogre.

The last thing she expected was for him to toss the worn comforter aside and sit up in the bed, letting his legs fall to hang off of the side. "You're just getting in?"

"Long night."

"You could've called. I am supposed to be lookin out for you, ya know. If something happens to you, Dad'll have my ass."

Buffy snorted. "Highly doubtful," she dismissed, handing him a warm cup of coffee. "Anyway, I am the Slayer, I handled myself for years before you Winchesters rolled in. I can handle myself now."

Dean snorted and rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say but you're 'patrolling' is interfering with my sleep schedule so why don't you try to shorten it up a little."

"I'm sorry, what kind of demons are you hunting that like to play during the day?" she bit back sarcastically.

He ran a frustrated hand through his disheveled hair and stood up, not bothering to get dressed, if she couldn't deal with him walking around in his underwear then she needed to get her own room. "You know what I mean, Buffy. Rarely do I stay out all night killing whatever it is I'm goin after. I research, I hunt, I kill, I sleep. I don't kill time but hunting something to take out my frustrations on."

"Don't worry about what I do when I'm patrolling alright! I'll do it my way and keep your mind off of my frustrations! I don't have any frustrations!" Buffy glared at him, trying to focus on his face and not the well-muscled legs that he stood on, not that she was any better off. One thing about the men in that family is that they were easy on the eyes.

Dean shook his head and stalked toward her leaning forward to brace his arms on the bed on either side of her. "I'd love to keep my mind off of you period sweetheart but seriously, you think I don't hear you in the shower? Ain't no shampoo that good," he snorted at her quickly feeling the imprint of her palm burn into his cheek.

"Get out of my face," she growled through clenched teeth, shoving him aside when he didn't move.

He chuckled and walked over to his bag, rummaging through until he pulled out a pair of rolled up jeans and a t-shirt. "Aw, don't get your panties all in a bunch, I'm sure Daddy'll take care of you sooner or later."

Her mouth fell open and she grabbed the first thing she could find, which turned out to be one of her favorite boots, and launched it at his head, missing by a mere inch as he disappeared into the bathroom. "Asshole!" she yelled after him only to grow more irritated when she heard him chuckling on the other side of the door.

With a loud sigh she fell back onto her bed, withholding a yelp as a spring poked into her rib. "Where the hell are you John Winchester," she muttered, wondering where her boyfriend had disappeared to now.

The last she'd seen or heard from him had been the night when they left the bar and nothing since. That had been three months ago. No call, no text message, nada. As much as she hated to admit it, Dean was right. She was frustrated but not sexually. What frustrated her was that she allowed herself yet again to fall for a man that was emotionally unavailable. Someone she could never have any kind of life with.

When she'd first met John it had been awkward and charged. Neither trusting the other for what they were until finally it seemed every doubt fell away and there were no more questions. They had one common goal and that was killing evil. And there was need.

Apparently for John, that need had been sated.

Buffy wondered if Dean had actually had contact with his father. He didn't seem to be that worried about his well-being and if there was anything she knew about Dean, it was his concern for his family.

The sudden chirping of a cell phone made her jump yet realizing what it was, she scrambled around on the bed until she was able to grab Dean's cell off of the night table.

It was a text message.

Unknown sender and a bunch of numbers she didn't understand. So much for the small hope that John wanted to see them.

"What's goin on? Who was that?" Dean asked from behind her.

She quickly turned and handed him his phone, shrugging her response as her eyes fell to his wet body covered by a towel that really covered about a thigh and a buttock. "Um… uh…" she shrugged again, feeling her face redden in embarrassment when she realized she was gawking at her boyfriend's son. She felt dirty… but she shouldn't. Dean was her age. A year older in fact and if anything he's the Winchester she should've been falling for all this time but she wasn't that lucky.

Dean brought out the worst in her and she hated herself when she was with him. True they worked well as a team when it came to fighting the forces of darkness and all that rot but personally they were on an entirely different playing field.

"Dad…" she heard him mutter from behind and whirled quickly to face him.

"What?"

"Its from Dad."

She frowned, wrapping her arms around herself as she felt a sudden chill. "How do you know?"

"It's coordinates. Dad finds a job, he sends me the coordinates to get there. That's the way he works."

Buffy looked at the floor before raising her eyes to his. "Have you talked to your dad since…"

He sighed as her voice trailed off, angry at his father for abandoning such a beautiful woman but thankful for giving him the opportunity to spend this time with her. Not that it was a walk in the park but it was time with her nonetheless. "Naw," he shrugged, shaking his head. "Dad's not much for phone calls."

She gave an understanding nod and turned away from him. "I'm gonna… I need to get some sleep."

Dean watched as she numbly made her way to the bed and took off her shoes and socks before looking at him expectantly. "I need to change…"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I guess I need to get some clothes on."

He walked into the bathroom, closing the door and leaning back against it with closed eyes. He was seriously considering kicking his father's ass the next time he saw him. Unless, of course, Buffy's feelings took a serious turn in his direction, then he'd have nothing but love for the old man.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Buffy thrust the heel of her palm upward into the demon's jaw before catching it off balance with a kick to the midsection. "That's for ruining my favorite boots you slimy … UGH!" she called out in disgust as she managed to quickly slip behind him and break his neck before he regained his bearings.

"Remind me to stay away from your shoes…"

The gruff voice sent a shiver through her and she turned around quickly lashing out at the man who stood not a foot behind her. "Where the hell have you been!?" she growled, her open palm quickly connecting with his stubbly cheek. "I've been worried to death about you…" she added softly.

John offered up a somber smile, opening his arms to the small woman in front of him. She took no time in jumping up to wrap her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist.

"I've missed you so much…"

He gently returned her kiss before pulling away and setting her back on her feet. "Sorry… I just…"

"Got caught up in trying to find the demon that killed Mary… I know."

"Buff…"

"Don't John. I know the situation, its fine. I just can't help…"

John pressed his finger to her mouth and slid his arm around her waist as he pulled her snuggly against his side. "Don't worry yourself alright. I've been doing this for a long time."

"So have I. Need I remind you, I've died. Twice. It's not like you're a traveling salesman John."

He sighed, tightening his lips as he opened the door to his truck and helped Buffy inside. Sliding in behind her, he revved the engine and pulled out onto the road. "How have things been going?"

"Fine. I patrol at night. Dean does your bidding during the day. We have a nice system," she bit out. All of her emotions were rushing forward. It had been six long months since she'd seen him or heard from him other than the few numbers he'd send Dean every few days. She was tired and she was angry. But she was happy to see him and happy to hold him again. Even if it was just for a few hours time. "I'm sorry."

John smiled, his dimples hidden beneath days worth of stubble, and reached over to take her hand. "I'm the one that should be apologizing. I'm a shitty boyfriend or lover or whatever the hell I am to you."

"No, John, you're not. I just wish I could see you more."

He took a deep breath and pulled his truck off of the road, stopping beneath an area of low hanging branches. "Come here," he breathed, his voice low and husky as he pulled Buffy towards him.

She rose up on her knees before throwing her leg across his lap, settling herself against him as his hands immediately slid up her legs and began kneading her thighs.

"You feel so good," he murmured in her ear, taking his time to kiss and lick his way down her throat as he did so. "So good."

Buffy purred against him, her body immediately beginning to writhe as she felt his desire tightening beneath her. "Please John…" she moaned reaching between them to unzip his jeans as he slid his fingers beneath her skirt and ripped off her panties without a second thought.

Her body was dripping with need as she eased onto his hard shaft. She took her time, savoring every single inch as he filled her. "Oh…"

"Buffy," John growled, taking her hips in his hands and thrusting up to meet her descent. "Oh fuck…"

His head fell back against the seat as she began to ride him. Her body tightened with every thrust and her eyes closed as she felt her desire threatening to spill over.

"John…"

"Oh, Mary…"

Buffy shuddered, her body nearly shutting down as the words escaped his lips but she continued on. Finally letting her anger and frustration get the best of her as she slammed her body onto his immediately feeling her release as she tightened around his cock urging him on as well.

"God Buffy, that… God I've missed you…" he smiled his eyes barely opening as he sighed and leaned his head back in exhaustion.

She stared at him in silence. He was so beautiful when he smiled. So young despite the peppering of gray that shimmered in his beard. So beautiful but he'd always belong to Mary.

Her heart was breaking and all she could do was blame herself.

Deciding not to mention the "Mary incident" she climbed off of him and slid to the passenger side of the truck. "Can we go back to the hotel now, I'm exhausted."

John watched her for a second then slowly nodded, taking his hand in hers as he pulled back onto the road.

* * *

Hearing the key in the door, Dean jumped to his feet and started forward agitated and tired. "I thought we made a deal, Buffy. You're supposed to be back from patrolling no later than tw… Dad?"

Buffy slid in behind John and quickly skirted the room heading directly to the bathroom.

"Dad…" Dean stepped forward, quickly giving his old man a hug before stepping back to look between his father and the bathroom door. "What's wrong with her?"

His dad just shook his head and stepped further into the room. "So have you had any problems with the jobs I've been sending you on?"

"No… never have. What the hell did you do to Buffy?"

John sighed and ran his hands over his face as the sound of the shower being turned on seeped beneath the door. "Nothing Dean. It's none of your business."

"It is when I have to play the sensitive male after you've gone and screwed things up."

"Just let it go."

Dean took a deep breath and crossed his arms over his chest and stared at his father. "What are you doing here?"

"I've tracked down the demon, Dean. I just wanted to come see you in person before I made my move. I wanted to you to know that I'm all right that this is me you're talking to. Remember who I am right now. If you see me again I want you be able to tell the difference between me and the demon."

"What the hell…"

"I can't promise he's not going to get to me before I get to him. And he'll do just about anything to get to Sammy which includes taking over my body so pay attention, Dean."

"Sam? What's Sam got to do with any of this Dad? He's at school he hasn't been out on a hunt with us for years."

"He wants Sam. That's why your mother died, don't you understand that."

John put his hand on Dean's shoulder giving it a firm squeeze before pulling him against him in a hug. "Take care of yourself son. Take care of Buffy."

"I'm not the one she wants or needs to take care of her."

"Dean… I can't do this right now."

"Fine. So you're just gonna leave again? You're not gonna say goodbye to her or anything."

John shook his head. "I'm the last person she wants to be around right now. And the last thing she wants to hear from me is goodbye. I'll be in touch."

Dean watched his dad leave the room before locking the door behind him and turning to face that bathroom door again. The shower was still running but satisfied that Buffy was back and he still had a few hours to get some sleep, he flipped off the light and slid into bed.


	4. Chapter 4

b Chapter Four /b 

Buffy stood under the spray of water trying to shed her pain with her tears.

She was officially done with John Winchester. There was no place in his life for her and he didn't deserve what she had to offer. She didn't deserve to be used and tossed aside whenever he saw fit.

Unfortunately, she had no one to blame but herself. She knew John was still in love with Mary and nothing was ever going to change that. She could only fool herself for so long but tonight had been the final straw.

She shut off the shower and stepped out quickly drying off and wrapping the towel around her before stepping out into the room.

It was dark and she could see that Dean was already in bed so she left the light on in the bathroom as she changed into shorts and a tank top then climbed into bed.

John being gone when she got out hadn't surprised her. That was what he did. She was going to lay down and forget about him.

She'd been in bed for twenty minutes before she realized she was crying and that was only because Dean's movements brought her out of her daze.

"You alright?" he asked, his voice somewhere between a whisper and talking but rough with sleep.

She sniffled and wiped her eyes with her hands before nodding into the dark. "I'm fine. Just stupid."

"You're not stupid Buffy."

A weak smile tugged at her lips and she shook her head. "Oh yes I am. I tried to believe I could change things. It's never worked for me before I don't know why I thought it would now."

"Buf…"

"No, Dean. I'm fine. Just go back to sleep."

She rolled onto her side, her back facing him as she did everything she could to get her mind off of John Winchester. She'd even welcome dreams of the Master at a time like this.

Again her body began to shake with the sobs that started to course through her but she kept quiet. Tears flooded her vision making the already darkened room an endless abyss.

It wasn't until the bed dipped and an arm slipped around her waist and pulled her against a firm chest that she knew she hadn't succeeded in keeping her tears to herself.

"Shh…" Dean said softly against her cheek before pressing a chaste kiss to her temple. "He's not worth it."

Buffy turned towards him and buried her face in his neck doing her best to sink into the warmth and comfort he provided. Her arms slid around his waist and she let the tears flow as he tried his best to comfort her.

hr 

Buffy woke the following morning to find Dean lying on his back, her leg tucked between his, her head resting comfortably on his chest and a strong arm wrapped around her waist holding her tightly against him.

She refused to take stock of how good it felt to wake up like that and pulled back to really get a good look at Dean Winchester.

He had the faintest scattering of freckles across his nose. Even with his face completely relaxed he had a few laugh lines around his mouth and eyes. And then her eyes settled on his full, pouty lips. She was in trouble.

He was beautiful though not the kind of beautiful that John was when he smiled. There was just something about Dean that until that moment she hadn't seen before and she found him breathtaking.

"Is there drool?"

Buffy's brow furrowed and she pulled away from him, using her left arm to hold herself up as she looked down at him. "What?"

"Do I have drool running down my face?"

"No…"

"Then why are you staring at me?"

Buffy's face turned a vibrant shade of red and she quickly turned away from him. "I wasn't."

"Yes, you were. It's ok. No need to be embarrassed I know I'm hot."

She snorted in response to his comment and stood, stretching her arms high over her head and bending from side to side to work out the kinks.

Dean watched mesmerized. Her shirt had drifted up to reveal her firm tan stomach and her shorts had managed to expose just enough so that when she bent from side to side the curve of her bottom peeked out at him.

"There may be drool now…" she tossed over her shoulder having seen him watch her intently.

"Shut up."

She smiled down at him not realizing her face had settled until he asked what was wrong. "Nothing. Thank you… for last night."

"I meant what I said Buffy. I don't care if he's my dad or not, I'm not letting him treat you this way any longer. If he can't appreciate you for who you are then the man's blind and stupid."

"You've said it yourself, Dean. He's still in love with your mother. He always will be."

Dean sighed. He didn't understand how his dad couldn't see the beautiful caring woman that he had right in front of him. But then again, he hadn't been there. If he were in that situation he wasn't sure he could move on either. "Yeah…"

"Look, I know I've been an enormous pain in your ass for the last six months but seeing that things are officially over with John, I think it'll be best if I go."

"Go where?"

"Home."

Dean sputtered for something to say. He really didn't want her to leave. "Bu.. yo… You haven't been a pain in my ass. It's been… Well it's been nice having you around. It gets lonely. It's not exactly a job that…"

"Dean?"

"Huh?"

"If you want me to stay, just say so."

"I want you to stay."


End file.
